Wait, what??? HOW DID IT BECOME THE FOURTH OF DECEMBER.
Where has this year gone?
I know it's not quite gone yet, but it feels as though this year has been longer than most.
We've lost a lot of people this year.
Friends, family, celebrities we looked up to or admired.
Things have not turned out in the ways we'd hoped.
Naively, I thought that once I was done with my marriage gone bad, I'd have learned to not let people use me, or take advantage of me, or put me in unwise situations. I thought I'd learned that I could trust those I'd decided to keep around me.
I can hear you all now, laughing, not at me, but with me at the naitivity and hope.
But you know what?
I'm okay with that.
Because yeah, I thought I'd found myself and my stable ground.
But I forgot that the ground, as you live, is never stable.
The more you grow, the more you strive to be better as a person, a friend, a lover, a human; the more the ground shifts under you.
Because the changes we make in ourselves create ripples and changes, however small, that affect every single person we interact with. Hopefully for the better.
Here I sit, on this fourth of December.
Reminded yet again, that living and life requires upheaval and change. And that is rarely pleasant.
So I take joy in this year so far. Because the pain and difficulty means I've been striving to change, to grow, to be better.
No seed ever grew without expanding and falling apart first.